WiFi Signal Locator Key-Chain. Have you guessed the problem with this yet?

"Man, I really want to get on the internet, but I really don't want to turn on my iPad without being 100-freakin'-percent sure that there's WiFi."

"First of all, that's a piece of cardboard, not an iPad. Second of all, there's no need for an iPad, because I have this WiFi Signal Locator Key-Chain!

"Dude, this is totally an iPad. I'm just using the 'Card Board' app."

"..."

At the end of the day, there are two major problems with this device. First is that the WiFi detection radius is unusably small. Secondly, it doesn't freakin' say if the WiFi it's detecting has a password or not. Isn't the point of this device to get you on some hot, stolen WiFi as quickly as possible?

"Don't mind me, just looking for WiFi..."